I have so many thoughts running through my head. I am questioning my ability to do any of this. My brain is doing the terrible "Maybe you were meant to be fat", "This is to hard.", "How come other people can eat cheeseburgers and french fries and things smothered in gravy?" "Why can't you just be skinny and beautiful already!?" Thanks Brain. Thanks A Lot.
My last post was on Thursday....I have kind of slipped on a lot of things. Last week I really wasn't feeling well. The Dr's were all thinking gall bladder. Long story short, its not my gall bladder. Had the HIDA scan done on Monday. Gall Bladder is functioning perfectly. Certain foods, like my beloved pineapple, are still setting me off. Super painful cramps, nausea and a nasty headache. My husband is thinking I have an ulcer. I will need to go see a gastro Dr as soon as I get the word from the surgeon.
Friday I don't think was super eventful. We had a Nor'easter come through with a lot of wind. Lots of trees down and rooftop damage to homes. We escaped unscathed!
Saturday was our planned Cheat Day. Will wishes to call them "Indulgence Days". We are planning on 1 every 60 days or so. That morning we got up and went to Cracker Barrel.
What I had:
- Mocha Latte
- Country Fried Steak
- Scrambled Eggs with CHEESE
- Hash brown Casserole
- 1 Biscuit with Gravy and Butter
We then headed home for me to finish my grocery list and then Chi and I met Mom at Safeway in LaPlata. Chi was not in the right mindset to be out in public I think. I threatened her with murder quite a few times. (relax people I am joking - I would never actually kill her) We finished up shopping and headed home. By this time it was about 2:30. Will asked for Pizza Hut for lunch.
What we ordered:
- Large Meat Lovers Pan Pizza
- 6 Piece Mild Buffalo Wings
- French Fries
- Pepperoni Personal Pan Pizza (Gwen)
- Triple Chocolate Brownie
What I actually ate:
- French Fries with Mayo (don't judge me)
- 1 slice of Meat Lovers Pizza
- 1 piece of Brownie
While I ate, I was making sure all my monopoly pieces were attached and the codes were scanned. This right here took me a good 1.5 hours.
Around 5:40 we headed over to Denise and David's place to drop off Chi and pick them up! It was Denise's birthday and we were headed to our first Escape Room! We met Deena and Chad up there and had the BEST time! What a cool experience!
Highly Recommend Laurel Haunt!
After our Escape Room, we headed back to SOMD for some Cold Stone Creamery Ice Cream! Because "INDULGENCE DAY!" and of course its Denise's Birthday!!! And she had never been to a Cold Stone! That was just unacceptable in my book!
We dropped them off and headed home around 10:30. It was a great day and an even greater ending! I love spending time with them! They make my heart happy!
Sunday was tough. I got up and cooked an egg, sausage and veggie bake for the weeks breakfast, as well as the yam, celery root and bacon hash. The veggie bake is not my cup of tea. The texture is spongy. I have a thing about textures. The hash was great!!!
Hash! Yum! I cooked my yams too long...oops.
Egg, Sausage and Veggie Bake.
I got some laundry started and then headed to VA with Mom again around 11. Spent the day with my awesome and amazing Aunt and headed back home around 7 Sunday evening. By the time I made it home I was pooped. My amazing husband had set his alarm to wake up when I got home so that if I needed to talk he would be there. I heart him.
Monday I went for my test/scan/thing. I wasn't allowed to eat or drink anything before hand so I hadn't taken my meds. My headache was in high gear. The poor guy had to stick me 4 times before he found a vein that didn't collapse on him. That was fun.
Monday I went for my test/scan/thing. I wasn't allowed to eat or drink anything before hand so I hadn't taken my meds. My headache was in high gear. The poor guy had to stick me 4 times before he found a vein that didn't collapse on him. That was fun.
I promptly took my meds in the parking lot, called in Chinese Food and went back to work. The rest of the day was pretty uneventful. Monday night I made a delicious new recipe. I stole it from Mom! I changed the snap pea's to green beans to make it compliant. I am telling you, these were the best mushrooms I have ever had!
Next time, I will use less cashews, more green beans and more mushrooms! YUM! Even Gwen ate it!
Tuesday was a bit more eventful. I tried Tuesday morning to write and upload this blog entry. But I just couldn't get it done. I feel like a total failure at the moment with the whole thing. The Whole 30, The Blog, The exercise. All of it. I was feeling pretty good Tuesday until I ate some pineapple with lunch. There went my stomach and headache again. Ugh. And then to top it all off, I went to stand up Tuesday afternoon and my knee did something terrible. I couldn't put weight on it or straighten it. I have done this a time or two before, horseback riding can be hell on your knees, and thought like the other times it would loosen up and be fine in an hour or so. Nope. Not today George. I found myself hobbling around the office using an old bent golf club for support. I got home and Will met me at the car with his cane and helped me inside. He then put his knee brace on me and I went straight to work on dinner. I had Gwen help me because I couldn't really maneuver well.
Dinner was awesome, even though I bought the wrong chicken!
I was supposed to get those little wings, drumstick things. Nope. I got regular wings. They were still amazing though! A little spicy, but really good. The chicken was moist and tender with lots of flavor!
We cleaned up the rest of dinner around 8 and headed to bed! I was hurting pretty good by then and was hoping I would wake up in the morning and be magically cured....its happened before.
News Flash - Not cured. Sigh. I didn't pack breakfast or lunch this morning. I had to call Janie to come get Gwen. I hobbled out to the truck and drove in to work with my shiny, new to me, cane.
Its not any better. I still cant straighten it. Weight on it is a no. I am headed back to patient first tonight for my follow up on my stomach/headache issue, may as well have them x-ray the knee too.
So my brain is yelling at me.
Shrimp Stir Fry
Next time, I will use less cashews, more green beans and more mushrooms! YUM! Even Gwen ate it!
Tuesday was a bit more eventful. I tried Tuesday morning to write and upload this blog entry. But I just couldn't get it done. I feel like a total failure at the moment with the whole thing. The Whole 30, The Blog, The exercise. All of it. I was feeling pretty good Tuesday until I ate some pineapple with lunch. There went my stomach and headache again. Ugh. And then to top it all off, I went to stand up Tuesday afternoon and my knee did something terrible. I couldn't put weight on it or straighten it. I have done this a time or two before, horseback riding can be hell on your knees, and thought like the other times it would loosen up and be fine in an hour or so. Nope. Not today George. I found myself hobbling around the office using an old bent golf club for support. I got home and Will met me at the car with his cane and helped me inside. He then put his knee brace on me and I went straight to work on dinner. I had Gwen help me because I couldn't really maneuver well.
Dinner was awesome, even though I bought the wrong chicken!
Fajita Chicken Wings
I was supposed to get those little wings, drumstick things. Nope. I got regular wings. They were still amazing though! A little spicy, but really good. The chicken was moist and tender with lots of flavor!
We cleaned up the rest of dinner around 8 and headed to bed! I was hurting pretty good by then and was hoping I would wake up in the morning and be magically cured....its happened before.
News Flash - Not cured. Sigh. I didn't pack breakfast or lunch this morning. I had to call Janie to come get Gwen. I hobbled out to the truck and drove in to work with my shiny, new to me, cane.
Its not any better. I still cant straighten it. Weight on it is a no. I am headed back to patient first tonight for my follow up on my stomach/headache issue, may as well have them x-ray the knee too.
So my brain is yelling at me.
- You can't do this!
- You are going to FAIL!
- See, every time you try to better yourself you get hurt! Just QUIT!
- You are better off this way!
- You set your goals too high anyway!
- You Aren't/Will NEVER Be Good Enough!
I'm struggling. I'm floundering. I need to get my shit straight. I need to remember WHY I am doing this. I need my brain to SHUT UP!
I need....to stop making excuses.
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